ADDICTED TO HATE (in 3 sections)

Addicted to Hate

I figured it out,
Call me all knowing,

“If you could just see the positive side of thi-“

Positive side?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…

I am addicted to hate,
It is that simple.

The traffic jam, the hangover, the family, the job, money, sex, ex’s, stomach pain, mosquito bite, below zero, over 90, college, sicknesses, industry…

My body bathes in HATE.

I’m no racist,
I’ll pat myself on the shoulder.

*
When my mother cries
The hate becomes
Visible
You can see it in
My hair,
Knuckles,
Eyes,
Mouth,
Teeth,
Each fucking molar.

She is beautiful
And she says
I use her
For a room to sleep in
And cheap thrills
Like movies
And pot.

To be honest
I know no other
To use for
Creature comforts
It only seems right.
*
It may be women
In general
Who get to thinking
I use them.
Or is it
Just…

BRAINS

If I said money was the root,
Cut out my tongue.
I must be a drunk
Shouting from the top of my eyelids.

I figured it out
It’s brains.

Brains made the money,
The money made the problems,
The problems are like cancer
They sleep and riddle
Everything
With death
And
Hate.

Brains

Talk about good and evil.
*
My mother
Is a superhero
I
Am a villain.
She wears sweat on her brow
And uses
Politeness
Potting soil
And
Perfection.
I use
Drugs,
Preservatives,
And…
ANGER

Hate is a good word
To describe how I feel about
Anger.

I drink anger through straws
And chew it
Like gum.

then spit

And anger is stuck on the bottom of my shoe.
Right under my nose.
*
In my mothers e-mail
She writes on all the things
She is unable to say.
And they hurt.
They hurt like a Hate crime.
And where they should make me feel sad.
I feel anger,
Because I Hate
Sadness.

I Hate it all
Just as much as
I Love…

Myself

I love myself
I am fucking handsome
Cooler than cool
And a genius to boot.

I am also full of shit
HAHAHAHAHAHA…

who isn’t

I don’t
Hate
Myself.

What good would that do
Except maybe
Make things easier to change
About
Myself
For everyone else.